Here’s a ten-point story audit that only takes a few minutes and could save your novel in the early drafting stages. I ran it on the current work-in-progress in the space of twenty minutes and got an almost clean bill of health.
It’s based on Savannah Gilbo’s Ten Writing Mistakes That Lose Readers. But instead of focusing on mistakes, I turned it into ten questions to ask about the novel draft. Results are below. Warning: mild spoilers ahead.
1. Does the Story Start Too Early?
If you’ve seen my post on the Early/Late-Close/Wide Opening, you’ll know this is a kind of obsession of mine. Beginning too far back in the backstory risks dull, irrelevant and misleading opening chapters. We want to get to the real story and engage. All that other stuff we can drip-feed later.
In Kamsen Knights, we’re straight into the action with Yari Tamm as she chases down a lead into her father’s disappearance.
2. Are the Genre Signals Clear?
Does the opening set the genre, tone and expectations for the story? Readers hate unclear openings. Crime, fantasy, espionage, romance; the reader needs to know exactly what they’re getting into without relying on the cover and the blurb. In the first three chapters, if not sooner.
Sometimes (horror and paranormal fans) the ‘ordinary world‘ opening presents a challenge. Sometimes you want to ground events in the ordinary before you break them with the extraordinary.
Kamsen Knights? A fortified, fantasy city, a dead emperor, a fallen empire. Swords and hints of magic. I think we’re right there.
3. What’s the Narrative Question to Pull Readers Along?
Good stories raise questions and hold the reader’s curiosity. There has to be uncertainty. Will the protagonist survive, find love, win the trophy, reveal the murderer, solve the riddle?
Mine is on the nose from beginning to end: will Yari find her father? Alive?
4. Does the Protagonist Want and Need for Something Specific?
The central character must want for something. Ideally it should conflict with what they really need. It can be material; the promotion, the trophy, the arrest. It could be thematic; love, redemption, belonging. But it has to be something you can express in one short sentence.
The want drives the plot forward, the need drives the story.
In Kamsen Knights, getting her father back is all Yari wants. It’s an obsession. What she needs is closure. What she gets is… something else.
5. Are the Stakes Personal and Urgent?
Stakes make the story matter. Stakes don’t have to mean life or death, but some meaningful measure of success or failure. They must be clear from the opening and remain relevant until the conclusion.
For Yari, family is as personal as it gets. The teetering state of the New Republic makes it urgent. Find her father before all clues are destroyed. No one else will do this.
6. Is the Antagonist Weak or Undefined?
The opposition must be embodied in something concrete. Which type of conflict does the story engage? Internal conflict such as man against self? Or external; man against man/society, man against nature, man against technology or the supernatural?
The antagonistic force can’t be an abstract or thematic concept. Injustice needs a biased court, bad cop, corrupt senator to represent it. Self-doubt must manifest in destructive behavior, poor choices, broken relationships.
This gave me pause. Despite plenty of obstacles to Yari’s quest, a failing republic, with broken justice is too abstract. We need physical opposition. It takes three chapters to discover a direct and personal threat from the Old Houses of aristocrats. An order of sinister priests adds another faction, but this is a longer reveal.
7. Are the Characters Flat or Inconsistent?
Readers may come for a genre or a premise, but they stay for the characters. Don’t hang your story on dull, unrelatable, unengaging characters, or those who veer wildly from core traits of values. Readers won’t stay, or else they’ll throw the book away in frustration.
Since I write character-first and plot second, I’m confident about my cast.
My teenage protagonist is both wise and reckless, brave and foolhardy. She is impetuous but self-doubting. She is task-driven to the point of alienating those who would help her.
Risto is a colorful rogue, thief and gambler with a complex moral code. All surface bravado and feckless abandon, we discover the heart beneath.
Mikailut has his own moral compass, clouded by his brutal career in the emperor’s army and a rough upbringing in a criminal underworld. He’s on an uncertain path to redemption.
Ledran learns from his past mistakes, while the ‘honest’ constable Branko has his own share of secrets and longings.
I don’t fear inconsistency. Character values emerge or unravel over the course of the story. My characters are inconsistent the way that people often are. Wants, needs, doubts, fears, self-doubt and internal lies create relatable flaws. Sometimes they grow, sometimes they fall back.
8. Does the Middle Lose Momentum?
There’s a whole discussion of the Messy Middle, the Midding Middle and the Middle Muddle. It’s a sure sign of too much plot and not enough story. Translate that to a lack of meaningful character growth. There should be a significant try-fail cycle in Act Two, with troubles, decisions and the consequences that drive character growth.
With it’s short length and tight plotting, there’s something going on in every chapter of Kamsen Knights. Threat piles on threat, bad choices have consequences. Yari seldom has time to draw breath, hurtling around the city from one crisis to the next. She learns something in every stage.
9. Do Subplots Serve the Main Story?
Often in early drafts, irrelevant sub-plots abound. Every side-quest must contribute to the character arc of learning and growth and ultimately feed back into the main plot.
My A-plot is Yari’s search for her father. Many obstacles block her path. The insurrection in the climax carries the big set-piece show-down. But it’s actually the B-plot. What the insurrection provides is fuel for Yari’s character growth and her emergence as a leader. The return of Yari’s mirror/shadow character concludes the A-plot. The resolution of the story makes progress in her search for Yanos Tamm.
10. Is there Meaning Beneath the External Plot?
Ah, the search for meaning. I could say it’s 42. But no. The external plot, Yari’s investigation, powers her coming-of-age story. The internal plot is about courage, sacrifice, redemption, and finding family. The external plot isn’t the main driver. The internal plot drives character growth toward a new state of being. And there’s nothing more meaningful than that.
The Score Card
You can apply this ten-point story audit at any stage of a work in progress. In fact, the earlier the better. These are all relevant questions a writer should ask throughout the process. Some may be easier to answer than others. Importantly, every one needs an answer; no skipping.
It’s a useful tool in keeping messy drafts on track. You can validate a completed draft right up to final; better to correct the course late than hit the rocks after publication.